Would you rather...

As you [should] know, I've recently started working at a near-by car lot. The majority of my time is spent at a desk, either making phone calls, organizing, filing or doing other busy work. One might jump to the conclusion that such things might be rather monotonous, however, there are other factors at my job that make 8-5 actually quite enjoyable. Like my coworkers...

...and our chairs.

After being at Uni for the past 5 years, I've noticed a certain level of adjustments in my life taking place. Like, for instance, waking up. It's not that I didn't believe 6am existed... I just assumed it was a theory. You know, like paying bills or buying socks.  I've also found that if I wish to be awake throughout the day, even if only semi-functionally, then I must make myself go to sleep BEFORE my 9 hour ipad battery gives out.
It's only been a week, and I've already had to reject my friends appeals of late-night mandates. In those times, choosing to rest seems like the responsible, adult, mature decision to me. To them, it's bedtime.

"Starwars marathon tonight, bro. You won't regret it."

Anyway, all that to say I'm adjusting a bit. It's not a huge change of life, more of just a change of pace. I think the huge change of life thing will happen in April.
Like I said earlier, my coworkers are really what make my job what it is, which leads me to the main point of this post anyway.

Yesterday, Amanda, whom you don't know but works in accounting, challenged me to a "would you rather". Now, I know, "would you rather's" aren't really ever intended to be a challenge, per se. But this one was. You see, the questions was, "would you rather, being stranded in the Kalahari Desert, choose to have either a knife or a blanket?" Now, asked matter-of-factly like that it wouldn't have been any big deal, but she asked it presuming that the only reasonable answer was the knife. The rest of the office was overwhelmingly in agreement with her, too. And for the rest of the day I couldn't stop thinking about this question. So because of that, and for the sake of any readers who might be unfortunate enough to be placed in this life or death situation, I've written this post to try and persuade you why choosing the blanket could be the best decision of your life...and here's why.

Knives are stupid.

This isn't just any desert we're talking about. It's the freaking Kalahari Desert! Which, unfortunately, is thought to be the worst desert in the world to be stranded in. The word Kalahari actually means, "the waterless place." 113 degrees Fahrenheit by day and below zero by night, you should be more concerned with regulating body temperature than hunting. Considering this, why in the world would you choose the knife? I appreciate that I'd be able skin a camel and all, but ain't no knife gonna keep me shady or warm. The way I see it, a knife will only serve two purposes in the Kalahari: slicing into cacti, and cutting through barbed-wire fencing.

...rather large barbed-wire fencing.

Upon further research, I don't think you'll be running into much of that. There's definitely use for it with the cactus thing, though, but that's about it. "What about hunting?" you might ask. Let's be honest, unless you or I are suddenly gifted with John Locke's safari skills, then a knife will be as much use to us in hunting as a graphing calculator is to my 6 year old niece.

Wait, in researching all of this I just found out that there are cheetahs and lions in this desert. CHEETAHS AND LIONS. One's the fastest predator I know of and the other's the king of the... desert. I take back what I said earlier. Knives are good. Knives are very good.

...Oh my gosh, It's totally past bed time.